A tribute

I have just finished my 101^st day in England, ~ 3½ months. I didn't even realise how much I was going to experience in this relatively short period of my life. I thought I was just going to study at a university abroad, enjoy the culture, and add something to my CV.

You are always told to live your life to the fullest, but I don't think many people really do that. So many days are wasted doing absolutely nothing, and everything becomes this grey blend you don't even remember. This doesn't apply to my autumn of 2013. Here, I lived my life to the fullest. When I get older and look back at my youth, I can say that I lived. I experienced. I would have regretted it for the rest of my life, if I had stayed at home. I did regret that I didn't go to live in the south of France when I had the chance, so now I wouldn't make that same mistake again.

I have so many memories from this journey. My adventure. Even though we had days where we shared these despairing looks of achieving absolutely nothing at all despite being loaded with essays and case studies, I oddly enough enjoyed it. I enjoyed it because I was in a place where I loved being. Among these fantastic people.

Right now, I am in Birmingham Airport, and all the comfortable seats are taken. It's going to be one hell of a night, but it is nothing compared with saying goodbye to my friends. I don't even know how it is possible to get so attached to people you'd only known for a few months, but I was crying my eyes out when I got into the cab. I tipped the driver £5 because he was so nice to hand me a tissue. At the train station, I started reading my notebook with greetings. I can't even describe in Danish how it warmed me inside. I need to write you back individually. I have too many things to say. I switched between crying and laughing and smiling, and I have no idea what people around me must have thought. And to be honest, I don't really care.

I know that I wrote in some of your notebooks too, but I had so much more that I wanted to share with you. I'm not satisfied with the short greetings, I wrote in haste. Please send me your e-mail addresses, home addresses, skype ID's, or something. I need it. For science. Or maybe just for my own sake. I know that I am not the most talkative person, but I do insanely much of thinking. And most of the time, I overthink. I am so much better at writing, and even though I'm considerably better at expressing myself in Danish, I will give it a try.

You guys have taught me so much about everything. Life. Myself. The world around me. I feel like I come back as a better person, and I want to thank you. I couldn't have completed this without you. And I'm sorry for being so emotional and cliché, but I'm really tired, and I speak from my heart.

For a more serious matter, this entry is a tribute to all of you. You inspire me. I wouldn't have been without knowing you. I am sad that I didn't get to say goodbye to everyone, but I will return. I will meet all of you again. I will travel to Finland and see the northern lights and experience a real sauna. I will travel to America, North and South, and be blown away by all the beauty, the dance, the music. I will travel around Europe to Germany, Romania, Lithuania, Belgium, France, and Sweden. I will forever be grateful that England brought us together.

Now, I truly am a global citizen, Fábio! :D (This smiley is dedicated to everyone who thinks I use too many smileys)

Now, I return to my friends and family in Denmark. I hope they don't think that I have forgotten them, or that I don't appreciate them. They helped me get here, and I am so eternally grateful for their support. They made me who I am, and apparently that is a pretty cool person according to the notebook!

Being proud

As some of my dear friends know, I've been struggling with my inferiority complex and social anxiety for many years. I've never really been outgoing because of my fear of others' judgement. It has always caused me trouble to engage in conversations. What if I said something wrong or stupid? What if people would laugh of me? On several occasions, I have stayed quiet for hours, not being able to put in a single word. I know my fears are irrational, but nonetheless, they just won't go away like that. In elementary school, I was afraid to eat my lunch in front of others, I have never raised my hand to tell my opinion, and I still get extremely anxious when I have to phone a stranger.

In my life, I have always defined my worth based on other people's judgement and interpretation of me. I did not believe that I could be worth anything if I didn't achieve something. I have always been a perfectionist and received high grades in school, but it didn't help increasing my self-esteem or self-worth.

After finally seeking help, I am more proud of myself than ever. Because of this therapy, I have now been able to move to another country all by myself. Here, I have developed more than I thought possible. I made a list of all the things that I was proud to have achieved. Some of the things are basic, everyday actions that would baffle many people. Why is it difficult to call for a cab or order sushi? I have engaged in political discussions, talked to strangers, made a lot of friends, arranged events, made this blog, been to the cinema alone, signed up for a project in Romania, done presentations in a foreign language (in front of strangers while being filmed and given a grade) and so much more. Now I have received an A- and an A in two of my written assignments.

I don't care if people think I am bragging. I am just genuinely proud of myself – who I am, where I am, and what I have achieved. Fucking proud.

Things I've learnt in Worcester (part two)

6. Always apologise

This is not new knowledge. In England, you are supposed to apologise for everything you do. And for everything others do. If someone bumps into you, you should be just as apologetic (if not more) as the one causing the disturbance. Rather too many apologies than too few. You don't want to be rude, do you?

7. Look out for bikes

Most bikes I have seen do not have a bell, and I assume it's because people don't want to come off as impolite by ringing the bell. I have not come across a cycle lane yet, so the cyclists usually ride on the footway. For me, this have resulted in many offended cyclists because I never notice them behind me. Apparently, they don't want to ask me to move. Oh yeah, that would be impolite. Instead, they just get more and more angry with me until I stop blocking the way. Therefore, always make sure that bikes can pass you.

8. People will steal your taxi

The only situation where British people aren't polite is when you want to go by taxi. You will call the company, schedule where and when to be picked up, and when your cab arrives, you can wave goodbye to it again. I don't know how many times this has happened. British students will steal your cab. This is the one time to be aggressive. Very aggressive.

9. Go out early

In Denmark, it is not unusual to head to the night clubs and bars at 2 am. My friends and I will meet between 9 and 10 pm to chat, play games, and drink, and sometimes it's even 3 am before we are ready to go clubbing. It would be unthinkable to go out before midnight. Here, the dance floors are packed at 10:30, and if you arrive after midnight, you aren't able to get in because of the queue. At first, I was baffled by this, but now it makes more sense to go out early. I actually enjoy going to bed at 3 or 4 am instead of 7 am.

10. Pizza is expensive

Compared to Denmark, everything is cheap here. Clothes, food, you name it. Except for pizza. A good pizza in Denmark costs between £6-8, and I actually thought it was a bit too much. Here, a large pizza (just a regular Danish size for one person) can easily cost £16. This is absolutely insane. I can get a sushi set for £9, but a pizza? Why? It just doesn't make any sense to me. It's not even in a restaurant. And it's not normal to serve pizza with creme fraiche dressing and lettuce. But a hamburger or hotdog stuffed crust pizza? Sure.

5 things I've learnt in Worcester

1. Remember your umbrella

When you look out your window, it might seem like the weather is going to be quite enjoyable. The sun is shining, and you feel like wearing a dress to celebrate this mood-boosting weather. But be careful. The rain is like a ninja; shows up when you least expect it, and it will fuck you over. Never leave home without your holy savior, the umbrella.

2. Have loose change

And by this, I don't mean the useless pennies that no machine will ever accept. Always bring cash. You never know when you need to go by bus or cab, leave tips, go to the laundry, or print something out. I always use my credit card for everything in Denmark, but here it seems almost impossible to survive without cash.

3. Get student discount

Here, student discount is more than just upgrading to a bigger meal in Sunset Boulevard. If you show your student card in almost any shop, you get between 10 - 20 % discount everytime. The only thing is that you need to ask for it. They don't tell you.

4. Never go shopping on a Saturday

This is the one day, you should stay at home. Do you like queueing and waiting? Wasting a whole day achieving absolutely nothing? Being jostled and crushed? If by any chance yes, you should go to Primark on a Saturday. You will change your mind immediately.

5. Dress up

Danish women never know what to wear when going out. Dress or jeans? "What if I am the only one wearing a dress?". And if you finally decide on a dress, it has to be black. The worst thing would be to be overdressed. Here, you can't overdo it! There's always a sluttier girl with a shorter skirt, a fancier female with tons of jewellery, someone wearing an animal costume, or a bimbo with neon coloured hair and polka-dotted shorts showing off half of her arse. You can wear whatever the fuck you want, and no one will raise an eyebrow (maybe except for international students). Use this opportunity!

To be continued...
 

Halloween preparations

Today, I bought a few things for Halloween. I really enjoy dressing up, and there are far more themed parties here than back in Denmark. Why don't we do this more often?! I have so many things at home I could use, and I didn't bring any. If I had my makeup, costumes, and my coloured contact lenses, my Halloween outfit would be much scarier. But I can't keep buying new remedies for every single party. What a shame!

My inspiration for Halloween this year:

But something like this would also be awesome:

I can't wait to watch the new season of The Walking Dead.

It's perfect for Halloween, and maybe I get even more ideas :)

I don't like Mondays...

I just had the worst morning ever.

I wanted to print out my assignment that I spent most of the night writing. The amount of time I spent turning on the computer was similar to a minor war, and when I finally pressed ”print”, the printer stopped working. Like the teacher I am, I tried to open everything possible. After several failures, I adressed the woman in Firstpoint, and she forwarded me to the maintenance upstairs. He followed me to the machine where another war broke out. He did the exact same things as I did. After this disappointing experience, he told me to go back upstairs and find another computer. I had to give up midway because my module would start in a few minutes. At that point, I had spent almost an hour in the Pierson Building, and I had not achived anything. Nor had I had any breakfast. After three days without sleep, I was on the verge of tears, and when I adressed my tutor apologetically, she told me in wonderment: "You are not supposed to hand it in until January."

FML!

LONDON, BABY!

Tomorrow, I'm going to London with a big group of international friends, and I am extremely excited! I have been there twice before, but the city has so many things to offer that you cannot see everything at once.

Unfortunately, I have quite many assignments to write at the moment (and I have to hand in two of them on Monday), so I have to bring my laptop and write during the coach trip. I'm really ashamed that I'm not done with my study product on student motivation yet (I haven't been motivated – oh, the irony), but hopefully I'll catch up! My experiences at uni seem a bit more important right now...

Next week, I will upload pictures from our trip :)